As of May 30th, 2010 Buster Brown is officially all mine. I made the last of 5 years of payments on him. Owning Buster Brown outright has got me incredibly excited but it’s that kind of excitement that isn’t transferable. I spent a good deal of last weekend exclaiming, “I paid off my car!” and although my friends are lovely and feigned joy for my benefit you could tell they couldn’t really give a damn. And why would they? It’s a personal victory over creditors. It’s not like I ran a marathon or won a Betty Crocker baking contest - I simply remembered to give HSBC a check every month for 5 years.
I know Buster Brown doesn’t look like much. Truth be told, I really didn’t like him when I first got him but for selfish reasons. I wanted a Rav4 – a blue Rav4 to be exact – but I couldn’t afford one. I needed a car badly as my Ford Ranger, Willy, had just about enough of driving me about. I got Buster Brown because he was cheap and reliable and had air conditioning (seriously, you drive around for 5 years in a truck without A\C – sometimes in the middle of the desert in July- and tell me how important it is to you).
But I didn’t like Buster. I cursed at Buster a lot, blaming him for all the flat tires he got (when really it was my habit of running over unforeseen nails in the driveway), kicking him for a dead battery, calling him a lemon when his recalled oxygen sensor went. But Buster stood by me through all my abuse and reckless driving. He has never once failed to start. He likes to play music loud too. He’s not so bad, my Buster Brown.
For example, he can go from 0 to 60 with the air conditioning on in a minute and 23 seconds!
He has this really fancy, gets dirty easily, unable to wipe the dirt off even with the strongest solvents, leather steering wheel!
He has a sunroof! But don’t open it because if you try to close it, the sunroof won’t sit right back in the tracks and will create a really awful whistling noise while on the freeway.
He has not only one, but TWO cup holders!
He has an AUX jack to play your iPod through the stereo! Actually, that’s pretty cool.
His power of invisibility! Because of his beige, similar to the color of the actual roads in California, he's practically invisible to other drivers who will attempt at all costs to run into you while changing lanes on the freeway! It's like being Wonder Woman!
It's like this, but with less tights and cool knee high boots.
He has this handy tray thing on the dash to store all your golf balls even though you don’t actually play golf!
After 5 years, Buster Brown has grown on me. And now I am fully responsible for him and his well being. I might have to change my policy of getting an oil change every 6 months\6.000 miles. I might have to slow down a bit. I might have to avoid stretching the limits on my stereo speakers. Maybe I’ll look a bit more carefully when backing out of parking spots so I don’t scrape any more paint off the bumper. Maybe I’ll wash him more than twice a year.
Nah, he wouldn’t recognize me if I did that.