Otherwise it’s been pretty quiet. This is sad really, since I want to write and will thus have to fill you in with mundane shit that will probably not be the least bit funny. Feel free to check in next week when I find the dancing kangaroo I’ve been searching for on Craigslist and report about the hilarity that ensues when we discuss the correct way to pronounce “cheesy puffs on toast”.
Ready then?
The Thursday Splenda incident slowly made way to Friday No Incident Gyro Day and it was good. I met Andy at the Harp where we socialized, did other things – food was involved somewhere – and Friday No Incident Gyro Day somehow morphed into Saturday Oh My God Where Did All These Flies Come From Day. Seriously, our back yard was swarming in them. We had to take tactical action and locate the source (open trash bin) and eliminate the flies (thank you Raid). (sarcasm) So that was exciting. (/sarcasm) Oh, there is a small pointless story I can tell you about from Saturday, but it’s a bit gross.
So we’re at R.E.I. buying Andy some socks and technical underpants. Andy has a degree (it might be a Master’s even) in computer science so even his underpants need to be technical. That’s how he rolls. While we are standing looking at the technical underpants Andy decides that this would be the perfect moment to let one rip, that is to say fart, and it was of the “silent but deadly” variety. This is also the same moment that Andy asks me to check the tag on his current underpants so he knows what size to get. I didn’t want to stand 5 feet next to Andy during the butt war currently raging against my nostrils, much less stick my nose in by the source. But since I love my husband and he offered up the very helpful “just hold your nose” advice, I did it, but it wasn’t pleasant. I personally think that he owes me one fancy dinner because of it though.
After all our errands, we made it back to the Harp for a couple hours, and later on ended up going to a Peruvian restaurant with Dave and Jill. I have determined I like Peruvian food. We were home by 7PM and ended up staying up until about 1 AM watching the entire first series of “The Worst Week of My Life”. A bit slow to get started but had us gasping for air by the time the father catches Howard fishing the goulash out of the toilet. It’s on Netflix in case anyone is interested – which you should be.
Howard attempts to get the ring that was swallowed by the dog he accidentally put in the cement mixer.
Because the underpants story and the staying up until 1 AM story (was that even a story?) are the only highlights I have up to this point, I’m going to abruptly end this here. Actually, its lunch time and I’m hungry and I don’t feel like finishing this later. What? At least I’m honest.
And thus ends the most pointless blog post ever, even though it had the bit about the underpants in the middle.
...and underpants and farts are always funny.
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