We started out our honeymoon (or as we started to joke – the jam-star or marmalade-sun) by driving to Las Vegas early Saturday morning to go see the USA Rugby Sevens. It might seem like an odd honeymoon location\event, but seeing as our first ever vacation together was the year previously for the USA Rugby Sevens in San Diego, it just sort of made sense. What I didn’t know when we attended the event last year, was that people tend to dress up in costumes for Sevens. Some costumes make sense but more often than not, they don’t. Last year I saw a guy with a fake ‘stach, 70’s hot shorts, and a pair of fairy wings. It makes no sense, but it’s fun, so what the hell? I knew I wanted us to dress up for this year’s event but we had a hard time decided what to go as. I really wanted to go as garden gnomes, but the outfit required sewing skills which I just don’t have. At the last minute, we finally decided to go as kings as we already had the beards and it kind of correlated to our support for England (hey! I have family there now!). Of course, once we got dressed up and attached said beards, I realized mine was just too damn itchy and I took it off claiming I was simply a queen. No big deal though it was a pain to navigate around a big bushy beard while rummaging around in my purse for things. Our costumes were a huge hit (more due to Andy’s awesome beard then the costumes in general) and we got asked to pose for many pictures.
Tom Boyd Stadium
King and Queen with their cheesy subjects
The first day at USA Rugby Sevens went pretty quick. We met up with my buddy, Tom, and his group of rugby cheeseheads, watched the matches, posed for pictures, and drank beer. Around 4 o’clock, Andy and I both made the mistake of ordering a Pina Colada alcoholic smoothie thing. I ended up getting the World’s Worst Heartburn and Andy developed symptoms of heat stroke. Boy, aren’t we fun? We hopped on the shuttle back to the Hotel from Hell, and rested for a few hours. By 7 PM we were feeling better and ventured out for some gambling. We went next door to the Tropicana and Andy taught me how to play craps Vegas style (versus company Christmas party style which I found is much more lenient). In my version of Craps Vegas Style, I order a new beer anytime the waitress comes around even if I’m not done with my last one (or one before that), I ask the craps dealer every time I lay down a chip if I’m doing it correctly, talk 18 levels more loudly than normal, continue to gamble even though the table is cold, and make people who I think are “lucky” stay at the table for “one more roll”. All in all, Andy lost $150 and I lost $40, which isn’t that bad considering we were there for almost two hours.
Valentine's Day King and Queen, sadly sans beards.
The next morning we slept in, got something to eat, and then headed back over to the USA Rugby Sevens. It was more of the same from the day previous but we managed to drink water in between beers and not get sick, and Andy (the awesome husband that he is) bought me a necklace and earring set from one of the vendors in honor of Valentine’s Day (he probably doesn’t want me telling you what a softie he is (sorry!)). At the end, we left and got the world’s worst meal at some English pub on Tropicana and then gambled at craps a bit more at the Hotel from Hell. I managed to win $80 off the Hotel from Hell, so I feel a bit good about that. I was tempted to throw my $80 on the floor and roll around in it chanting, “Suck it Hooters” but that would have been both highly inappropriate and really unsanitary.
We left Vegas on Monday morning around 11 AM. Most of the time, if you live in California and you go to Vegas, you will leave on Sunday. This is a fine except that you have to remember that EVERYONE is leaving Vegas on Sunday. If you don’t leave before 10 AM, fully expect that 4 hour drive to turn into 7 hours. As it was Monday, I honestly thought we were impervious to this. It’s Monday! Everyone will be back at work already! No problems! Yeah, except it was President’s Day…and we got stuck in Baker. And it took us over an hour to pass through Victorville…and Corona. When you are a bit partied out and incredibly tired, the last thing you want is to sit in traffic for 7 hours. But that’s exactly what we did.
Watch Andy try to be nice about his fellow drivers after exclaiming moments previously that he wanted to pull everyone out of their cars, beat them with a dirty badger and eat their livers.
NEXT...Honeymoon in New Orleans.
Oh Andy...everyone knows that there is no need to hide road rage. Road rage is the only time when one actually expresses their true emotions.
ReplyDeleteSounds like you had fun at the games aside from heartburn and heat stroke. I liked your version of Craps Vegas Style. If the alcohol is free...keep it coming. They are already taking your money in other ways. I would have made you say "Suck it Hooters!!!" but as you shake the $80 in your fist like an angry old man. Who knows how they clean the floors if that was how clean your room was.
BH